One year ago today, I walked through those doors at the MTC, excited and nervous for this new chapter in my life...
One year ago today, a sweet little old lady pinned on my shiny new black name tag...
[my mtc district]
Here I am one year later...sitting in Arizona instead of Georgia.
[a traditional mtc photo]
The last year has been filled with both blessings and hardships.
I loved my mission.
I loved being a missionary.
I fell in love with the people.
I feel in love with Georgia.
I fell in love with missionary work.
I fell in love with the gospel of Jesus Christ.
[sister barton and i walking 4.5 miles in the pouring rain...
but we're still smiling!]
I was heartbroken when I came home so much earlier than I'd anticipated.
I would wake up in the mornings and not want to get out of bed.
When I was with people, I wanted to be left alone.
When I was alone, I didn't want to be by myself.
I hated seeing my parents crying tears of frustration, feeling like it was all my fault.
I hated looking in the mirror at myself and hearing the voice inside my head, telling me that I was a failure; that I was worthless; that I wasn't good enough; that I was unlovable.
[sister fine and i, excited about the first snowflakes]
This coming Sunday, I will have been home for seven months.
And I can honestly say that I am happy with where I am at right now.
[the collier's, including the newly-returned missionary,
kristen aka sister collier]
While I still miss the mission, and while I still wish that things could have worked out differently, I am beginning to see Heavenly Father's hand in all of this.
[on an exchange in buchanan]
I know that He loves me, unconditionally, and I know that He is in control.
I hope y'all know that, too.
2 comments:
What a sincere, sweet post about such happiness and hardships. I love you for this writing....Sis. Brinton
It's a process I'm very familiar with, coming home and trying not to feel like I was somehow a failure. Even for me, 22 months after coming home, I still realize a little more every day exactly the same thing: Heavenly Father has bigger and better things in store for us, and knows what He's doing by guiding us down the paths we need to take to get there and really appreciate it. :)
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